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The Myth of Mommyhood - April 9, 2012

“Being a mom is the best job you’ll ever have” is a quote frequently shared between women. I agree 100 percent, but it should also be said that “being a mom is the hardest job you’ll ever have.” For most of us moms, having children is a dream that we have wished for since we were little girls playing with our dolls. Wasn’t it fun to dress them up in pretty little dresses, pretend we were feeding them, and then rock them to sleep? Such peaceful little creatures! The thought of being a mommy brought up images of idyllic bliss and a sense of real completion and harmony in a family. Even the images of childbirth that we saw on TV were sheer perfection. A few pushes, and the doctor says, “It’s a girl! (or boy),” and then he lays a perfectly clean little cherub on your chest. The reality of being a mom, starting with childbirth is, well, messy.

I have some darling, young, single women who work for me in my office. They often tell me how cute my kids are and how much they hope to have great children like mine someday. I realize every time I talk with them that there is an unspoken code between moms that you don’t share the gory details of childbirth with untainted future moms. I find that I typically say something like, “It’s an amazing experience. Giving birth is very hard, but once you have that beautiful little baby in your arms, you would do it again in a hot second.” Followed by, “My only advice is, just don’t bring pretty new pajamas with you to the hospital like they recommend in childbirth class, because all you really need are some baggy black sweats.”

For more excerpts from Deborah’s book, From Margaritas to Mac ‘n Cheese Mom, click here.

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